A few years ago, I found a creative way to use EFT to help a client who had some "bones to pick" with several people at his workplace but knew it would be unwise to really confront them. It was a work situation in which he (we'll call him Paul) had been treated unfairly by several colleagues. Due to the dynamics of the workplace, it would have only made things worse to have it out with them, but Paul was still seething with anger and resentment . Here's what we did.
I had Paul sit in my recliner, which made it easy for me to tap for him. As he thought about his feelings concerning each of the three people who had wronged him, we tapped like this:
Karate Chop point:
Even though I'm still angry at them, I deeply accept myself.
Even though I'm still angry and hurt, too... they really betrayed me... I accept myself with kindness and compassion.
And even though I can't say this to her face, this is what I would tell "Kelly" if I could....
Then I tapped on all the points (eyebrow, side of eye, etc) as Paul expressed all his hurt and anger:
How could you do this to me? I thought you were my friend. And I've bailed you out in the past. Is this the thanks I get? You're so intent on getting ahead, you don't care who you step on. You'd better not expect any favors from me, I've had it with you. You're not my friend. You went behind my back. How unprofessional and how low. (etc.)
I kept tapping until he couldn't think of anything else to say to her. He took a bit sigh and said he felt a lot better.
Then we tackled the other two people involved in the same way. We stated in the Set-up:
Even though I can't say this to his/her face, if I could tell this person off, this is what I would say...
And then Paul expressed his anger and hurt and disappointment in every way he could think of. It began to get silly and even funny. Soon he felt extremely calm and free of all the anger. He could breathe deeply for the first time in days.
I often use a little inner imagery to finish up. We finished with a brief visualization in which Paul imagined a courtroom and put them all on trial before a judge and jury. We went right to the outcome and he felt deep satisfaction as they all were found guilty. I asked him what they'd be sentenced to. "A year of community service. That way, they'll have to think of someone besides themselves."
Recently, I received this update from Paul:
I just thought that I would share with you that I have been promoted! I would not have been able to keep a positive attitude if it had not been for the sessions we had and all of your help through this difficult time.
How good to know that, because he tended to his angry feelings with EFT, he was able to maintain a professional attitude despite the difficulties --and eventually it really paid off.
Betty Moore-Hafter, www.CreativeEFT.com, is an EFT International Accredited Certified EFT Master Trainer of Trainers and Advanced Practitioner offering EFT Level 1-2 and Level 3 Trainings several times a year. She also offers a special EFT mentoring and support program for EFT International EFT certification at www.EmotionalFreedomMastery.com. Betty offers EFT sessions by phone and by Skype, as well as in person at her Burlington, Vermont office. You can find out more on both websites and pick up free gifts on each site.
From the EFTfree Archives, which are now a part of EFT International .
Originally published on January 7, 2010.