The highest priority of any living organism is survival. Whenever a threat appears in the environment, humans instantly and unconsciously activate their reflexive, sympathetic nervous system (SNS). This releases a cascade of stress hormones throughout the body, priming it for fight or flight. One of the ways this mechanism works is by taking energy away from functions that aren't necessary for survival. In evolutionary terms, all that's not necessary when being chased by a saber-toothed tiger. For a man, this includes having an erection or being able to indulge in hours of leisurely lovemaking.
The Relationship Between Stress And Male Sexual Function
The stress response, an important and purposeful part of our survival mechanism, is designed to be activated in short bursts. What we see today, however, is that more time may be spent in stress rather than ease, and this can have catastrophic consequences. While a man may readily admit to being stressed, he may not realize the very real impact this has on his sexual expression. The fact is, the hyperarousal of the SNS (the stress response) inhibits erection and stimulates ejaculation. It’s a modern tragedy how so many men feel disempowered, not understanding this relationship between stress and sexual function. Oftentimes a man, though not diagnosed as such, may describe himself as having a “sexual dysfunction” though in reality he is functioning just as nature intended.
A simple equation to keep in mind is that an increase in long term or chronic stress can lead to decreased sexual desire, function, pleasure, satisfaction, and an increase in relationship challenges. Of course, the first port of call for a man with sexual concerns should be his doctor. Yet often his doctor will say they can't find any reason for his problem. This in itself can add to his stress if he’d been hoping the doctor could give him a pill to resolve his problem. Meanwhile, if his stress continues to pile up every day, “stressed” can become his default state. In this, he finds it very difficult to relax, and more difficult to get or sustain an erection, or to last when he does.
The Importance of Relaxation
The SNS is only one side of the autonomic nervous system (ANS). The other side is the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) which brings a sense of relaxation and ease. During sexual arousal it’s the PNS that promotes the release of pro-erectile neurotransmitters and induces vasodilation; this allows blood to flow into and fill the spongy tissues of the penis to cause an erection. The inability to switch off from stress can make it difficult to be in a state of relaxed arousal needed to enhance erections and the ability to last longer.
How Thoughts Impact Stress
Even if one doesn’t live or work in a stressful environment, it’s important to remember that stress can also be created by thought alone. If a man feels under pressure to perform he may have thoughts such as “What if this is like the last time?” or "Am I going to be able to last?” Anxious thoughts racing through the mind, even in the absence of a real threat, can be enough to trigger a stress response. So the simple act of worrying about his performance can send a man into a state of hyperarousal.
In this state, the brain drains blood from the prefrontal cortex, where logical decision-making occurs, to the more primitive limbic system which governs fear and emotion. This makes it harder to think rationally or to relax, further inhibiting the ability to achieve or sustain an erection. So, men who are stressed or preoccupied with performance concerns may find themselves caught in a cycle where the mere anticipation of failure becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
EFT for Stress Reduction
In life, there's an endless list of potential stressors unique to each individual. They all, however, create the same stress response. When a man understands the effect stress can have on his sexual function and performance, it can be empowering for him to realize “I'm not dysfunctional, I'm stressed!”
A number of studies demonstrate the effectiveness of EFT as a stress reduction tool. Working with an EFT practitioner can be transformative for a man dealing with sexual problems that may be rooted in stress. EFT helps to rewire the brain and body's response to stressful events or thoughts, enabling the nervous system to relax and recalibrate. For men, this can mean an enhanced ability to experience relaxed arousal and improved sexual performance. Working with an EFT practitioner, he can learn how to effectively use EFT as a self-help tool, and discover how EFT can foster self-empowerment and bring a renewed sense of confidence and ease in intimate experiences.
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Author: Abi O'Donovan, Certified Accredited EFT Practitioner
Photo by Luis Villasmil on Unsplash
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