I call my 91 year old mother every day (she lives alone 600 miles away). Recently I called her twice in the evening and wasn’t able to get through. The next morning, I called as soon as I got up. She told me that she had become quite ill and had been vomiting since the day before. I asked her if she had been drinking fluids, and she immediately put the phone down to get a drink of water. She forgot that I was on the phone. I couldn’t talk to her because she left the phone off the hook.
I called some of her neighbors and asked if they would check on her. Finding her confused, they ended up taking her to the hospital. After finding her a bit dehydrated but basically OK, she was released into the care of a friend who spent the night with her to make sure she was OK. Her friend called me that afternoon, saying I needed to come down immediately. I dropped everything and flew down the next day.
Soon after I arrived, I sat down with my mother and listened deeply to her. When she had become ill, she really thought she was dying. What shook her friends up was that when she went to the hospital she wasn’t wearing her false teeth, her hair was messed up, she was only wearing one sock and she was very disoriented. My mother always looks as nice as she can and it was shocking for her extended family to see her so unkempt. The next day I took her to a follow-up doctor appointment where she was given a memory test. She failed. The doctor was required to tell DMV, and my mom lost her driver’s license.
My mother’s extended family met with me twice, expressing their concern about her condition. They felt that I was in denial about her situation. They said they thought she needed to be moved to an assisted living facility, and gave me the name of one to see. (My mom has been living independently ever since her second husband passed away about 10 years ago. She still vacuums, washes the windows and walks every day.) When I visited the facility, and told them that my mom had mild memory issues, the representative said my mom would have to be locked down in the memory unit. She gave me a tour of the facility, and it broke my heart to see and smell where my mom would be. I made up my mind to make sure my mom would not have to go there.
During the meeting with my extended family, I told them that I wanted to find an angel to live with my mother – someone who had a big heart and would look out for my mom. They told me that they didn’t think I could find someone like that. They had been trying to find someone for an elder friend of theirs and had been unsuccessful.
So, I created a spiritual alignment (also known as a prayer treatment or affirmative prayer) for my mother:
I know there is an angel who lives in a room in my mother’s home in trade for being with my mom and helping her. I know she’s sensitive with a big heart, and loves to interact with my mother. This angel enjoys helping with meals and eating with my mother. She loves to play Scrabble with my mom. She loves walking together daily in the quiet neighborhood where my mom lives, and listening to the birds on the patio.
I know this is so as I release it into the Universe.
And so it is.
Coming Into Alignment
I let my spiritual center know my spiritual alignment, and they also prayed for my mother, too. I didn’t know how this scenario was going to work out, but I knew that it was in process. When I started having doubts about being able to find someone to help out, I used EFT to clear my resistance.
Some of the Setup phrases I used were:
People are telling me it is impossible to find someone trustworthy to help my mother out, and part of me believes them, I love and accept that part of me...
I feel overwhelmed by all the things that I have to do, I love and accept myself...
I get scared when I start thinking about all the negative possibilities that could happen with my mom…
I live 600 miles from my mom, and she can’t live with us. I feel guilty that I am not doing more…
Tapping on Doubts and Fears
Sometimes I would wake up in the middle of the night with my doubts and fears, and I would tap them away. I tapped until I didn’t feel any energy around these issues.
I looked online for available senior services. I found Elderhelp.com has a program called Home Share in which seniors share a room in their home in trade for services. I scheduled an appointment immediately, and a representative found my mother suitable for the program. At the end of the consultation, the agent reported that she thought she knew of someone who would be a perfect match for my mother.
We met with the first prospect from the Home Share program, and it wasn’t a good fit. The second woman, “Maria,” was very sensitive. We all got along very well. Before she left, my mother asked her if she was an angel. To make a long story short, that woman is now living with my mother. We have become friends. She has been there for over two weeks as I write this. It is a good fit even though she isn’t a Scrabble player.
Maria has a big heart. I’ve been teaching her how to do EFT, and she has found it very helpful for her own life. Maria feels grateful to be with my mother, and I am grateful that she is there, too. It is a win-win.
From the EFTfree Archives, which are now a part of EFT International .
Originally published on April 23, 2011.