Every year, it happens. The usual grumbling about having no time, too much stress, and on top of it all, so much food everywhere that it is nearly inevitable that we gain weight. And increase our stress. How can we best use EFT and meditation to deal with both issues, and others, throughout the holidays?
Hanukah is over, but Solstice, Christmas, and New Year’s are ahead, and every day seems to bring another party or lack thereof, another family crisis or the reminder of loss. What is most important in navigating this geography of grit and grace is to remember to actually use the tools we have.
Meditation
I know, it seems crazy to even think of meditating now if you’ve never started. And even veteran meditators can sometimes feel that there isn’t time during these few days. But now is the best time to either just continue your daily practice, or, if you’ve never had one, to start. Give yourself the gift of meditation this year…start on a day that seems auspicious to you - perhaps Solstice, or Christmas, or New Year’s Day. Allow yourself just a few minutes of silence to start, and don’t worry about the “quality” of the meditation. Just allow yourself to be in silence, in stillness. For those who are practiced, you might even consider adding another sit to your day, even if it is just a teeny one - five or ten minutes.
The benefits will be enormous - meditation reduces blood pressure, stress, and a whole host of negatives, and improves, basically, all the positives in our physical systems. In so doing, it balances us emotionally, allowing stress to roll off and actually allowing a feeling of openness to unfold during the day. Reduced stress will help balance the impulsive eating you may be tempted to do as mounds of cookies and savories pass by you at work or at parties — it can directly help you slim down or maintain your weight, whichever you decide to do. And of course, volumes have been written about the physical, emotional, and spiritual benefits of meditation. It is one of the best gifts you can give yourself this year.
EFT for Stress
Again, I could write a book about EFT and stress - and so, probably, could you. The thing is, if you locate the reason for the stress, and tap on it, you’ll release the problem quickly and give yourself a much better holiday season. In traffic or long lines, tap on the collarbone point while breathing deeply, inhaling peace, exhaling the stress or problem. Do full rounds of EFT when you can, but when you can’t, find a favorite point and tap away. The more you tap, the better things get, so give yourself permission to tap more than usual during the holidays. It is interesting that clients of mine who have big, close families are driven nuts by them during the holidays, and clients who are alone during the holidays are just as stressed - using EFT to release the problem and allow in peace will make things much better. A caution here - the holidays can bring up great, deep feelings of sadness over losses in our lives. People we have loved who are not in our lives anymore, circumstances that are different or devastating, deaths of those we care about - all are somehow often magnified during the holidays. Use this time to tap and meditate, but if you are noticing that core trauma is arising, do find a highly skilled EFT practitioner to work with. The good news is that EFT really works — you’ll have a lighter new year once you resolve the deep trauma.
EFT for Overcoming Overeating, Under Eating, and for Emotional Food Balance
Surrounded by messages and images of food that key into our DNA (literally), it can be extremely difficult to shy away from overeating. When you throw in the emotional component (we’re under stress and it seems to feel good to eat, food growing up was always a sign of love and comfort, etc, etc… or if we are anorexic, food is the ultimate place of power — a way to show that we are in control.) What we gain from EFT is both an emotional balancer and a physical “off” switch. As with generalized stress, take time to tap for the overall problem — be as specific as possible, and tap a few rounds before going to a party, or going to a big family dinner. On the run, tap somewhere — anywhere — while briefly focusing on the situation, breathing, and releasing it. For example, while you are cooking and you are tempted by all of the food in front of you, find a place to tap that works for you — step away from the food for a minute and do some fingertip tapping, while you walk out of the kitchen. Remind yourself that you don’t’ need to eat right now. Stop and have a glass of water.
If you are a chronic "restrictor" or under eater, or are technically anorexic, the same idea applies. Check your stress and tap on it. Find out what is behind the compulsion to over-restrict. Give yourself a pass during the holidays to eat extra, if you are still at the stage in which you need to add some weight — it can be an easy time to allow it back on, while having fun. Know that you will not gain too much — it is just not in your nature. Allow this to be a time that helps you balance things out, physically and emotionally.
Major Feast Stress
Give yourself permission to take time well before the dinner or food event to quietly tap through the stress you are feeling. Family stress? "Being-single" stress? "Being-married" stress? Stress of losses? Remind yourself of what is important to you during this season and the upcoming dinner. “Frontload” your decisions by thinking ahead to what you’re going to choose — leaning heavily toward greens, veggies of all kinds, and fresh fruit.
Feasts and Alcohol
Remember that alcohol is not your best friend during the holidays, or any high-stress time. It not only adds a lot of sugar and calories, it is a depressant, and a mood-alteration vehicle that will do a number of things, reliably. It will act on your system to give you, eventually, feelings of depression. It will take away inhibitions, so all the resolve in the world won’t stand in the way of overeating, or saying and doing things you may really regret. Adding to your chemical imbalance may add to your stress levels, thus putting your whole system off-balance. Give yourself permission to have a lovely glass of wine (one for women, two for men) over the course of a night, but give yourself permission to be free of the extra calories and mind-alteration! If you find that it is pretty difficult to do this, do some EFT on what is going on, and give some thought to your levels of drinking. If you have problems with it, the best gift in the universe you could give to yourself will be sobriety and getting help.
Treats and Feasts
Feasts go back into our human history for tens of thousands of years. They can be wonderful, life-affirming, all that. So also remember to have fun. Find the one thing you absolutely love, and have some of it. Just don’t have the whole turkey, or lamb, or whatever. Enjoy a piece of chocolate, not the whole box---tap away the cravings or longings for the rest.
New Year’s Gift
Getting on the scale on the first of the year down pound or at your same weight will be another very nice gift you have given yourself — enjoy!
Give yourself permission, this year, to be free during the holidays — free of the strain of overeating and remorse, free of stress, free to open up to the gifts of the season. By using EFT and meditation regularly, you’ll be going a long way toward that freedom.
Lynne Shaner, PhD, is an EFT International Accredited Certified EFT Master Trainer and Advanced Practitioner in Rockville, Maryland, US. She is also a certified hypnotherapist and holds a Ph.D. in the field of Mind-Body Medicine.
From the EFTfree Archives, which are now a part of EFT International .
Originally published on December 18, 2010.
David says
Thank you, Needed a little push.
Have a calm happy new yr.
Janet Hilts says
Thanks for the reminder that if we use these tools as we go along, holiday emotional overwhelm doesn’t have to happen. And neither do the other holiday overages. EFT and meditation – what a great combo to take us into a beautiful start for the new year! Thank you, Lynne, for laying it out so clearly.