I love and accept myself…

How much do you 'love and accept yourself'? In EFT we use a set up phrase to prompt our brain for the shifts which tapping will enable. It always starts with the acknowledgement of the issue, plus the emotion connected to it, followed by an affirmation of self-assurance.

With that, the magic starts to work - you've entered the realm of brain chemistry change, emotion shifting, hence trauma freedom and so on.

But how do we really love and accept ourselves when we say

There is a new wave of mature women allowing their hair to transit into grey. I'd love to think this is not just a fashion statement, a new hair colour trend. I would rather think that we are making more natural choices. Guided by a spark of self-love and self-acceptance for who we really are.

I have lived in the UK for over a decade, dealing with hard water and weather damage to my hair. It was time to let it breathe, I decided, and take a break from dying it every couple of months. I am turning 41 soon, and naturally my crown is beginning to show signs of maturity, so I had been colouring it for a while. On mentioning to some people that I was not going to dye it anymore, all of them gave me the 'look of insult', as if I had sworn at them.

The truth is I probably will dye my hair again, maybe get some chic 'caramel' highlights inspired by some some social media celebrity. But for now, I am wallowing in an exercise of self-love and self-acceptance. And whenever I choose to colour my hair again, I will do it because I love it so much I want to make it even better, and not because I despise the grey strands on my head.

I often see people struggling with their weight, their skin, their bodies, their addictions. As a therapist, you can tell when they choose to stay the way they are because they are perfectly comfortable within themselves.  You can also tell if  their self-hatred is such that they wouldn't lift a finger to change their situation. Some people would spend their lives fruitlessly fighting these issues off, not knowing that no change can be achieved on the outside - body or life - if our motivation is coming from a self-disgust perspective.

The whole idea of self-love and self-acceptance is that - No, you don't have to give up on changing things that you're not happy about yourself.  Nevertheless, whatever changes

you are trying to achieve must come from a place of self-love, self-care and self-preservation.

Remember that love will generate a frequency that will connect you with certain health professionals.  Hate will connect you with others.  Which one would you choose?  How much do you love and accept yourself anyway?

Juliana is an Accredited EFT Practitioner who specialises in complex issues, self-esteem and emotional pain.