A middle aged woman that I will call Lisa had an intense fear when people yelled at her; She felt like she was going to die. She had been feeling this way her entire life - a life filled with experiences of people yelling at her and forcing her to do things their way. She never really felt empowered. As a child she was extremely fearful and compliant and yet as an adult she had learned to show anger to protect herself. She thought she only had two options in responding, either fear or anger.
She explained that her overwhelming fear related to an upcoming event where she would encounter a person again, I will call her Nancy, with whom she had already had a few experiences where she was yelled at previously. She was terrified to go to this event in the future.
We decided to go to the most intense, recent past experience Lisa had with Nancy using "Faster EFT." The Faster EFT technique (www.fastereft.com), a variation of EFT developed by Robert Smith, is focused on releasing and letting go of the emotions and body sensations that a client is feeling. It aims directly at the details of what the client is doing in their mind, what they are feeling, seeing, hearing, and sensing, while always telling the subconscious mind to release and let them go. Faster EFT does not use the Setup phrase, “Even though I have this _______." Instead, you tap on each point and say what you are feeling or seeing and add “release and let it go” at every point. Faster EFT uses only five meridian points for tapping which are eyebrow, side of eye, under the eye, collar bone and a gentle squeeze of the wrist and then you take in a breath and blow it out and you say “peace” after every tapping round. It talks directly to the subconscious mind to let go. After all the negative emotions are released, our experience of the memory often changes.
I first asked Lisa to feel her feelings and then imagine herself seeing a tree in front of her and asked her what happens to a tree when it is pulled out from the roots? "It naturally falls over and dies," she said. This metaphor sets up the subconscious mind to let go.
We tapped on the eyebrow,“release and let go of all of this anger”, tapped on the side of the eye, “release and let go of all of this fear”, tapped under the eye, “release and let go of the looks on her face and that yelling voice”, tapped on the collar bone, “release and let go of all the emotions and feelings associated with this.” Then I had her gently squeeze her wrist, take in a deep breath, blow it all out and say “peace.”
I asked Lisa to go back after each round and we tapped directly on the details of what she was feeling, seeing and experiencing. We would tap and say release and let go of every one of the details that she mentioned while tapping through the points and then she would take a big breath and say, "peace." After each round she would see and feel different emotions and feelings and pictures and we would tap on them.
During one of the rounds Lisa was very resistant to letting go of her anger, as she felt like she would have to let go of her machine gun and then she would only have the option to run away as she went into deep fear. She felt like she would die. We tapped on these details, but it wasn’t releasing. We tapped back and forth on letting it go and not letting it go and it wasn’t shifting. She said she remembered getting beaten with a strap by her father as a child many times, so we immediately went to one of those memories.
We tapped to release the fear of being beaten and the looks on her father’s face and it released the emotions and the looks and the feelings. After the first round she said she could deeply feel herself in a concentration camp and was watching everyone around her being shot and killed at the edge of a deep pit. She said she could feel the bullet going into her own head, feeling the pain and feel herself slowly dying after being shot by a gun.
We immediately tapped on every detail of what she was feeling, seeing, experiencing and remembering. We tapped to release and let go of all the physical pain in your head, that bullet in your head, let go of that feeling of dying, let go of all the fears, let go of the sound of the guns, let go of seeing the other men dying, let go of the sounds of the men yelling, and ultimately we reframed and tapped into the peace she could feel when it was all over and when she was on the “other side.” After tapping a few rounds her fear of dying and her fear of being yelled at by others was completely gone. Then we sent love back to herself in all of the old memories that we worked on. She said she felt like a new woman. I tested her to see if she could make herself feel any fear when she thought of anyone yelling at her, and she said no – she felt internal power and confidence and she knew she had new choices in responding.
Was this really a memory of a past life, since this didn’t happen to her in this lifetime? I feel that it doesn’t matter one way or the other. It is all just energy and she was feeling it intensely right then in this lifetime, so all we had to do was tap and release and let it go now. I do not think this will bother her again in this lifetime. We can release energy from memories in this lifetime or past lifetimes – all the same.
Vicki Donhowe
Cincinnati, Ohio, US
www.successmindedcoaching.com
From the EFTfree Archives, which are now a part of EFT International .
Originally published on January 15, 2011.
Ray says
Excellent article! This actually has some ideas that can help me with some of my own repressed anger that is being stubborn.
Thank you.
-Ray.